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The Fiver | ‘Noisy neighbours’ live up to their name

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Whether it’s gouging opposition coaches in the eye from behind, publicly humiliating a doctor for refusing to illegally encroach on the pitch to treat a player he’s ordered to feign knack or disparaging referees for doing their job correctly, José Mourinho has always been the personification of fair play. As gracious in defeat as he invariably is magnanimous in victory, the Manchester United manager was understandably irritated when his club’s famously “noisy neighbours” lived up to their name by celebrating their victory at Old Trafford with actual celebrations: playing loud music, busting moves in their dressing room and creating the kind of din that can distract a manager who is busy dreaming up outlandish excuses to explain the manner in which his team have just been outplayed by their city rivals ahead of his media duties.

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