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The Fiver | Hipsters who have pretended to like the Bundesliga might even tune in

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The first of Europe’s major leagues to restart after being shut down by the Covid-19 crisis more than two months ago, Germany’s top-flight footballers are ready to take their first tentative steps back into something vaguely resembling normality this weekend. To give you an idea of just how far ahead of Blighty our Teutonic cousins are when it comes to emerging slowly from lockdown, it’s worth noting that citizens of Berlin are currently able to visit their local barber shop to get a short back and sides before adjourning to their local cafe for a flat white. The Fiver, meanwhile, has barely left the crawlspace it calls home for eight weeks and recently found a nest of mice residing in the involuntary bouffant we’re cautiously optimistic will win us first prize in tonight’s inaugural neighbourhood Art Garfunkel lookalike competition on Zoom.

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