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Sports quiz of the week: Barcelona, José Mourinho, Nick Kyrgios and clowns

This week’s quiz demands that you accept the result – even if you score zero

José Mourinho said Liverpool were 'cautious' against Manchester United on Monday night, but how many shots on target did his players muster in the game?

None

One

Three

Five

Nick Kyrgios has been suspended from tennis until mid-January for showing a lack of effort at a recent tournament. Why has he pulled out of the Rotterdam Open in February?

As 'Holland is freezing in winter'

So he can 'go on a mate's stag do'

So he can play in a celebrity basketball game

As he only wants to play the grand slams now

Who will captain the England rugby league team in the Four Nations (once he returns from suspension)?

James Graham

Sam Burgess

Ryan Hall

Sam Tomkins

Manchester City lost 4-0 at Camp Nou this week. Who was in goal for Manchester United when they lost 4-0 at the same ground under Alex Ferguson?

Fabien Barthez

Peter Schmeichel

Gary Walsh

Les Sealey

Who said: ‘Just don’t come near me in a clown mask. Don’t come near me period or I’ll slap the head off you anyway but, if you’re in a clown suit, I’ll slap the head off you even more’?

Didier Drogba

Conor McGregor

Mario Balotelli

Ronda Rousey

Why was play interrupted at a PGA Tour golf tournament in Malaysia this week?

So the players could watch the US presidential debate (Donald Trump owns the course)

A six-foot python was spotted on the course

So everyone could watch the Liverpool v Manchester United match

As a player threw his putter into a lake in frustration and had to find a replacement club

Which former England international has been nominated for the Golden Ball award, which is given to the best player in the North American Soccer League?

Bradley Wright-Phillips

Steven Gerrard

Joe Cole

Shaun Wright-Phillips

Steve Bruce led Aston Villa to their first away win in 437 days on Tuesday. The polymath manager has written three novels – Sweeper!, Striker! and Defender! – but what did he call his autobiography?

Bruce's Truth

Heading For Victory

On The Nose

Bruce's Bonus

Which football club has won all nine of their league matches so far this season?

Bayern Munich

Feyenoord

Juventus

Celtic

Why were Muangthong United declared champions of Thailand this week with three rounds of matches still to be played in the league season?

The other clubs decided they couldn't catch them so conceded the season and went on holidays early

The Prime Minister declared the season finished so the national team could train for their upcoming World Cup qualifiers

The King of Thailand died so the country went into a 30-day mourning period

The rainy season was especially wet so lots of games were cancelled

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