L’Oignon Bag – Euro 2016 diary: David Guetta, Slaven Bilic and a blue burger

Also featuring: Cristiano Ronaldo’s expansion, Euro 2016 Shower Gel, and Diego Maradona’s BFF

David Guetta – Uefa’s official 2016 music ambassador, delivering “an exhibition of French spirit and mass choreography” with can-can girls and a pair of dancing lips on day one. Among the reviews: @ningers – “Every second Guetta plays increases the likelihood of Brexit.”

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